It needs to be said right off the bat.
This whole SOPA deal? Freaking me out. And it’s down right stupid. I applaud wordpress.com for censoring everything on its site for 24 hours (at least that’s what I hope they’re doing.)
If this is what SOPA would do to us, that is an infringement on my rights as an American citizen. I have the right to put my views on a blog if I so choose to. I’m not forcing anyone to read it. People do not have to believe it what I’m saying, or even agree with it in the slightest bit. In fact, I’m open to confrontation and disagreement. Tell me I’m a slobbering idiot for my views. I’ll take your criticism, actual and stupid, in stride. The point is, no one should be silenced from saying what they want to say. It sounds much simpler than what is really is. The instant you take that away…that’s when the real trouble begins.
I know logging onto wordpress.com and seeing black censored boxes where daily blogs are showcased for anyone’s viewing pleasure is rather chilling. Are we retreating back to the days of the Cold War? I sure hope not.
Actually, this reminds me of what happens in The Hunger Games. I’m probably making this connection because I’m in the middle of the 2nd book currently, but in the books, the government controls every source of outside information. The TV programs show what The Capitol want the people of the 12 districts to see. Telephones are only for those in the higher levels of the upper class, and even then, each line is tapped so the government can listen in. There are hundreds of satellites in the sky watching everybody’s movements….its ultimate Big Brother. Everything is seen in one way or another. If SOPA and PIPA pass, that’s where our society is headed.
Not to mention Europe, Asia, and the rest of the world will hate America more than they already do.
It also reminds me of the Empire. Palpatine controlled everything about the galaxy, including the flow of news to every where in the (what used to be) the Republic. The planets that resisted him? He cut off their outlets to surrounding systems. He showed footage on the holonets of what he wanted them to see. There was no getting the straight scoop.
If this happens….we are all doomed. Hopefully I find the way into Narnia or stumble upon Middle Earth before all of the world goes to hell.
Other than being greatly shaken up by this turn of events, I haven’t had a horrible day. I’ve received wonderful news about my Star Wars dance piece I choreographed last semester. There’s a possibility for its return to the stage…but I’m keeping this bit of information hush-hush for right now. It’s not a done deal, and I don’t want to get my hopes up in case it doesn’t end up happening. That’s always the pits. But, it would be super cool, and I’m so lucky to have made an impression on people so much that they would even recommend my piece to this organization. Fingers crossed everyone!
I’m getting back into the swing of things will the Academy, and my tennis course is going to be fantastic. This makes me sound like a typical girly-girl, but for once, there are more males than females in my class. A number of them are really, really cute of what I could see at a glance. And talkative. On top of that, after hearing from everyone, I may be one of the more experienced players in the class…despite not having touched a racquet in 2-3 years. We’ll see how my first actually playing day goes….lots of rust to get off the hinges. Even just talking about tennis made me excited to be near a court again…I can’t imagine what I’ll feel like when I’m whacking a ball around with a touch of skill in my natural habitat again. I miss that feeling. I’m going to claim it again.
Speaking of tennis, I have the words of Anna Kournikova here today: “I am beautiful, famous, and gorgeous.”
What a self-assured sportswoman she is.
Actually, I find her to be someone who just got plain lucky. She’s good-looking, and yes, made a career at tennis. But was she really that good at the sport? Honestly…no. Good enough to raise a few eyebrows and make people take notice of this waif, blonde girl who has a decent serve. But when it came to the real competition? Nothing, nada, zilch. She had a cute butt that didn’t work its magic against fellow female players too focused on slaughtering her all over the tennis court in front of a national audience. Oh, and a title. And a trophy. And bragging rights.
She may have been at one point, but once the modeling and watch commercial deals started rolling in, that’s where her head was at. She took the game of love and turned it into a cash cow where it became all about the moo-lah (see what I did there? HA!)
Kind of disrespect her for that. But, there is truth in her words. If only every women in the world could have that sort of confidence twenty-four hours a day, there isn’t a thing we wouldn’t be able to do. I am not, for the record, praising the idea of making yourself look beautiful in a superficial sense. It’s not about outer beauty. I for one can attest to this weird phenomenon. Whenever I go home to the farm, I don’t watch a lot of TV. I don’t go on the internet, and I barely use my phone (and yes, we do have service out there…it’s not that I don’t use them due to lack of availability. We’re high-tech. I just refuse to use it.) I’m in a T-shirt and jeans, or sweats, most of the time. My hair goes up in any old ponytail form is wants to take on, and I don’t put any make-up on. I do throw on mascara when I head into town for whatever reason. I never leave the house without it.
But, after a long days work, I shower, look into the mirror, and I like what I see. It’s natural, and I would call myself beautiful. It’s my rehab to go home. Get all the gunk out and off my skin. Sweat off a few pounds. Tone up the jiggly areas. Get a breath of fresh air for once. Get knocked over by my dog.
The bad thing about leaving home is I can feel my sense of invincibility fall off the moment I’m more than an hour away from home. Back to the city life, back to the make-up and being dolled up for work. Back to being surrounded by people with smart phones and Ipads. Wherever I end up in life, I hope I make a lot of money. I’m going to need my city home and a country home. I need that rehab time out in the middle of nowhere away from “civilization.” Although, if either of these bills pass legislation, there won’t be a civilization out there to belong to. Everything will be spoon fed to us, and no one will know the truth.
I should probably take a page out of Katniss’s book and learn how to hunt. It might become an invaluable, and wealthy, skill to have once the technology era dies in this country.
Yet, here I am, using the internet to get my thoughts out. If the government shuts down my blog, I’ll start another. There’s no stopping this Jedi. The Jedi are needed now more than ever, I feel. The Dark Side has great power, but it takes a greater Jedi to resist the temptation of power and wealth. I’ll see what I can do.
In the meantime, I’m trying to keep my mind at ease with my doctor’s appointment tomorrow. Could be good news. Could be bad news. I’m bracing myself for whatever happens. My sister keeps asking if I want her to come along, for support and stuff. I’m not sure how I feel about this. If its bad news, I want to let it hit me and sink in before I say anything. If it’s good news, well…won’t it be evident on my face when I walk out of the exam room? It’s if I hear bad news I’m worried about. Fingers crossed everyone!
On top of everything, I can’t shake the overwhelming feelings of anger I felt towards my ex-boyfriend whom I ran into today. I sat in the same room with him for more than 5 minutes. Only after everyone had basically vacated the room to get to class did I finally look at him square in the face. He acts as if nothing ever happened between us, and it hurts me. It hurts me so much. Take my heart out, squeeze it a few times to watch the blood squirt out, and then stop on it once, crushing it enough to weaken it, but not enough to actually kill it. A slow, painful ending. Why does he do this? Why does he act like nothing ever passed between us? Lots of things happened when we were together. It wasn’t like it was a handful of days, or even just a couple of okay months. We were together for a year and a half, and in that year and a half, I fell in love with him. I may look at him now and see the not-so-perfect guy, the guy who wears the same shirt 3 days in a row, who never shaves, nods at me and keeps walking when we pass each other in the hall. The guy who casually says, “Yup…I’m boxing up your stuff tonight. It’s in the way.”
Oh, I am so very sorry for the inconvenience of my sleeping shirt and toothbrush.
What about you breaking my heart? Or the crap you’ve left all over my apartment? What about the lies you fed me 2 days before saying we had to end it?
This isn’t going to help matters any. We’re over, and have been over with for several months now. I used to entertain the thought we would get back together, but now I look at him and say, “Not a chance.” Maybe one day, when we’re well into our careers and I’ve weathered a few more broken hearts. When he’s experienced a few, too, because he can’t commit the way he should. A part of me really hopes he looks back on us, and calls himself a fool.
No, a Damn Fool, for letting me go. I know I’m better off. I’ve met a handful of new guys already, and New Guy is one such gem I’ve since stumbled upon. If Damn Fool hadn’t broken up with me the night before, New Guy and I never would be where we are now.
It does not good to dwell in the past, but a part of the Jedi Path is to feel the emotions when they hit, and let them pass. This, too, shall pass in time. The pangs of longing for what once was shall dissipate. I never knew a heart could feel so much until these last couple days have happened. I’ve lost love, could be seriously ill, and my future is so wide open, it’s scary.
I am beautiful. I am famous. I am gorgeous.
Well, maybe I’m not famous….but I can be the other two, and so much more.